I think I hid my cynicism pretty well, and in fact it was the Prosecution that came closest to making me inappropriately crack-up laughing.
It was a case where the accused had committed an offence and then, drunk and wildly emotional, had resisted arrest while unleashing a tsunami of abuse at the PC whose job it was to subdue him.
The prosecutor was a properly posh young man with a suit that probably cost more than my car. His accent was cultured and the way he delivered the swear words had me biting my lip. I have bleeped some of it because this is after all a family blog:-
"You {obscene gerund] [female genital] !And so on. At some length.
Come on you [male genital] !
You and me; man to man; I'll beat the living [obscene gerund] [excrement] out of you, you [female genital]"
Obviously this is serious : you don't resist arrest and you don't verbally or otherwise assault a policeman in the pursuit of their duty - so it shouldn't be remotely funny, and we sentenced accordingly.
It was just the way the lawyer said it; like he was reading a weather report - with a flat intonation, in a Radio 4 voice.
Mrs Stan will testify that I can become doubled-over, unable to speak, incapacitated if something really tickles my funny bone.
If this ever happens in court, I intend to fake a heart attack.
5 comments:
Many thanks for your blog. Had my initial interview this morning and your experience on questions was very useful. I wonder if my panel were using a similar bank of questions to you? The interview lasted an hour, very probing, with a thinly veiled attempt to unsettle me and, presumably, see how I reacted. I left feeling I had spoken well but having absolutely no idea if I would fit the criteria that the panel was searching for.
Mart : I was fairly convinced that I'd blown it on first interview. I left feeling I'd spoken like someone for whom English was not their first language and who had also sustained a recent head trauma, and they still offered me a second interview.
They definitely do goad you a little to see whether you'll combust under pressure - I'm sure more than a few applicants rise to the bait.
Check out the 6 key qualities - http://radiofreestan.blogspot.com/2008/10/spending-too-long-on-question-1.html - this is what they are intending to measure you against.
Good luck, and be prepared for a massive amount of nothing to happen for really quite a while.
Thanks Stan. I had a letter on the saturday after the interview to say that I had been selected for a 2nd interview. Have to take passport photo, passport, two other forms of ID and turn up half an hour early to study some papers that will be subject of a discussion. I was very please, many people I had spoke to knew someone who had applied and not got through. 2nd interview is in 3 weeks!
Stan, I'd like to add my thanks to that of Mart's. Excellent blog.
I'm slightly ahead in the selection process having just completed my second interview. A more "technical" experience if that's the right word but still plenty of none to subtle attempts to try and get me to turn into Angry of Tonbridge Wells...:)
Now of course, as you suggest, it's the long wait.
Good work Mart & Jeff - best of luck. Just remember : it's only bad news that travels quickly in the Department of Justice , so no news is probably good news.
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